I feel stupid.
How could I once again, trust my dog? He's just a dog. I've heard they are equivalent to a 4 year old child. Would you trust your 4 year old child not to run into the street and then chase after another child ( or in this case dog)? I took him to work today and I was having a good day. Got lots of work done and got there early so I could leave early so I could get to my 12:15 meeting and then this. It's 12:30 now and I just finally quit shaking. When he got out of the car he went to pee and I opened the gate and I swear, I saw his little mind thinking about something else. There was no dog in sight but he knew it was there, just around the corner. I called his name and he took off around the corner, across the street through traffic and confronted the dog. He never got a chance to say much more than HI cause I was on him like white on rice! My adrenalin was pumping but I still had control of my emotions. I didn't hit him (though I thought about it) but I did scold him heavily. Bitched at him as I drug him by the collar into the house and banished him to his corner to lay down. That's when I started shaking. After that, I started wishing for Valium. I never have any but I think about it from time to time. The old alternative to all of this would be to do a couple shots. And then a couple more and then more. The old me. So, no Valium, no shots, no hitting the dumb dog and now just calm. The old me would have let this ruin my otherwise perfect day and the rest of the day would have been spent in an alcoholic daze or haze and then the consequent hangover, etc., etc., etc. Now, I'm going to lay down and take a nap. That almost always makes me feel better and I'll pet the dog before I lay down. I've read somewhere, that they don't really remember what they did wrong after about 5 minutes. Sounds like the old me too.