Link I'll never drink again Vol. 2: This from my sister via a friend in Pittsburgh.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

This from my sister via a friend in Pittsburgh.

Well, I passed this email to Mom, and she said, well, this email is for Larry (and his company)..It took me a minute, but then I realized she is right....PS to Bob: Larry's company specializes in (sanitized version) "sludge." Essentially, they turn shit into shinola - not a bad trick!!

Hi, Jewel You know my fascination with language. I came across the following learn-ed discourse and just had to pass it on.

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD
Well, it's shit ... that's right, s-h-i-t -- SHIT! Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

Consider:
You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or have shit for brains.
With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit, or be asked to shit or get off the pot.
You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit.
Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.
There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits.
There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit.
You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.
You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.
Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty.
Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.
You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit.
You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.
When you stop to consider all the facts, the word shit is the basic building block of the English language.
And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!
You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit!
Aw shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head...........
Well, Shit Happens!

(Ya know…I have listened to a bunch of George Carlin in my day, and tho I never heard the above from him, it sure sounds like his humor, his drift on and use of our language, as well as his cadence when deliverying his routine…whadayathink?)

me in pgh

3 Comments:

Blogger lash505 said...

Geez thats a lot of s h i t

7:28 PM  
Blogger Scott W said...

Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of
Knee-deep Schitt, Inc.
Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and they had 6 children: Holie Schitt, The twins; Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt and Bull Schitt.
Jack and Noe divorced. Noe later married Mr. Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they had Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony.
The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg, Byrd and Horse. Bull Schitt left home to tour the world. He recently returned with his new bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now, when someone say's you don't know Jack Schitt, you can correct them.

- U don't know Jack Schitt
- Yes i do, he's Awe and O. Schitt's son

3:49 PM  
Blogger Trudging said...

Personally the "F" word is my all purpose word.

1:46 PM  

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