I feel like I'm right on the edge of a bridge, about to jump off and I've no idea if it's safe to jump or not. I got the raise I asked for. The CFO said we need to sit down and talk about some issues. I said fine...whenever he wants. I'm not worried about it. But today, while I was shredding some documents, I came upon some proposals that change everything. Seems we're going to expand some more. We just bought out 6 other company's last year and it looks like we're going to do it again. I realize now that I'm in a very good position to jump back on the corporate band wagon, if I want. I could consider myself one of the luckiest Record Managers alive. It's not often you get to start out with the company instead of coming in and seeing what kind of record keeping was done before you got there and having to clean up the mess. It's a Records management dream and I'm the star.
So, now what do I do? I have a good head for this kind of work but I'm not accredited. I don't have a college degree, heck, I only have 1.5 semesters of college and that was in Elementary Education. Will their insurance be all I need it to be? I have my HIV status to think of and I'll be 55 next month and supposedly only have 10 good working years left in me. Ha. The CFO offered me a decent salary in an offhand kind of way and to be honest I'm not sure that's what I need. I'm not sure what I really want to do. I'm not sure I want to give up this life style I'm now living. Yes, I could get a real apartment with more than one room and I could have the "expensive" HD cable. But, there's really nothing else I'd change. I don't know, I don't know. I do know I can't sleep from thinking about all of this. Well, I'm not going to decide tonight. Yawn. Maybe now I can sleep.
Ok. I slept. When I woke up I thought: a digital camera, new shirts that I can button up to the neck so I can wear a tie, tinted windows for the car and mud flaps. That's all I'd change if I took the job. Oh well, off to work I go.