Happy Anniversary to Me!
It was two years ago and maybe right about this time of day, that I crawled out of bed after (who knows how long) drinking, drugging and wondering where was my car. I decided to change my life, or at least to try and promised myself I'd go to an AA meeting that day. I'd been to a meeting once or twice before in the previous 20 years, but as it turned out, this was the one that made the difference. I know I felt sick but I don't remember anything else. I don't remember who took me and I'm sure someone did. I wouldn't have gone by myself. I don't remember the meeting but I do remember feeling all alone in the world and the room. I just knew I couldn't go on the way I had for so many years. It wasn't working. Something had to change. I had to change. And it wasn't easy or quick. It took a long time to get as low as I was and would take quite some time to get back up. My sponsor, Norris, was there for me, to help me understand, to see that it would work out if I could just be patient. He was careful not to push too hard or step on my toes. I didn't like being told what I needed to do. Still don't like it much but I figure your entitled to your opinion, even if I don't always agree. And I made friends, good one's, people I knew I could count on when I needed to. Not like the so-called friends I had at the end. I had this rosey picture in my head that said everything would be wonderful and the shit that keeps happening to me would stop and everything would be better. Well, the shit didn't stop happening but almost everything did get better. I got honest, with myself and began to see things in a different light. So Today is an anniversary, of sorts and I'm glad I'm able to be here to celebrate it.
One other thing. When I first started blogging, I couldn't spell worth shit! My grammar and punctuation were horrible. I hadn't written anything that anyone else would need to read in many, many years. You know that old adage that says if you don't use it you lose it? Well it's true. I'm still trying not to end my sentences in a preposition (Scott) but I know I spell way better than I used to.(oops) As for grammar and punctuation, well, I'm trying. So not only is this blogging thingy good therapy, it's also good for reawakening the mind. A wasted mind is a terrible thing. (that could be taken two ways)